This team isn't very loveable right now, apart from Greinke. Even The Big Donkey is in a funk.
Same as it ever was. Pretty much.
We thought the Royals were going to be pretty good, but we thought the offense would have a slightly more perceptible pulse.
We are not very impressed with Hillmanball right now.
We do have to admit that we are pretty impressed with DeJesus right now. Grudz, too. Gathright, not so much.
The word is out: Pitch Butler in tight. He's going to have to prove he can turn on one of those pitches and yank it DEEP IN THE AIR, preferably off or over the wall.
Of course, the next time The Big Donkey does hit one off the wall, he's sure to get thrown out at second.
Who will hit the next home run first: Butler or Teahen or Greinke or TPJ?
When you get shut down by Sidney Ponson, you have to start doubting yourself, and you deserve to be living in a shotgun shack.
Geez. We need some offensive PLAYERS. And there really aren't any position players on the farm to look forward to in the short term. We're just going to have to endure this for a while. Shit.
If we produced results like Mike Barnett, we would have been fired by now. (This is not really true. We work for the American people, and the less we actually do, the more likely it is that we'll be put in charge of something important. At which point, we might find ourselves behind the wheel of a large automobile.)
P.S. We've got computers. We're tapping phone lines. We know that that ain't allowed.
P.P.S. This ain't no party. This ain't no disco. This ain't no fooling around!
P.P.P.S. We're offering a free "Royals Fans Do It Donkey Style!" (TM) T-shirt to the first fan who can put this post into its proper musical context with an appropriately witty comment.*
P.P.P.P.S. Hillary and O'Reilly are almost certainly going to have a torrid love affair. The chemistry between those two is unbelievable, partly because they're both Butch Lesbians. Good for them. Big Donkeys wishes we had a foil to turn us on like that, but Ann Coulter won't return our calls.
*We still don't have any Big Donkeys T-shirts.
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6 comments:
With apologies to David Byrne:
The Royals are on a road to nowhere
Come on inside
The Royals are takin' that ride to nowhere
We'll take that ride
Well done. You win an imaginary shirt that will go nicely with our imaginary offense.
BD - Talking Heads "Road to Nowhere" is not the same as "Life During Wartime". Sconie can have the t shirt, but I'm thinking that there's a hoodie in my future!
I will wear my imaginary t-shirt proudly.
Hoodies all around! I'm going to listen to "Once in a Lifetime" right now, and think of 1985.
True, “Road to Nowhere” is not the same as “Life During Wartime”, it’s also not the same as “Same As It Ever Was”, but you weren’t witty Mr. Anonymous, and that was then and this is now, and this is a chair, and that’s a lamp, and you have boobies, and I’m going to get that t-shirt.
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