We're just sayin

Imagine if a Democrat president had

-- relied on false propaganda to start a war in the Middle East
-- mismanaged that war terribly
-- declared mission accomplished years ago
-- doubled-down repeatedly on failed policy (though the surge kinda worked after billions of additional dollars were spent)
-- presided over a collapse of the housing market and a huge increase in the price of gas
-- failed to respond with any curiosity or speed or competence to a major natural disaster
-- increased the deficit exponentially
-- mortgaged American power and standing in the world to the point where Russia thinks it's a super power again*
-- repeatedly suggested that those who don't agree with him are unpatriotic
-- stood by stupidly for eight years while the Kansas City Royals finished in last place something like seven times
-- approved a Wal-Mart strategy of drafting college seniors (like Aviles) and offering them $1,000 to sign, take it or leave it, while others in the same round were getting $100,000-plus
-- approved a Tony Pena Junior Bobble Head Night because nobody could have foreseen that TPJ wouldn't be the starting short stop come September.

Now imagine if Obama, like McCain, was saying things like "Speaking for ALL Americans...We are all Georgians"...and was bragging about talking to officials there every day...After criticizing his opponent for acting like he's already president.

Meanwhile, we're hearing that Obama, unlike McCain, doesn't put Americans first (because he's black/muslim/a terrorist/a celebrity).

What a bunch of horseshit. We're so sick of being painted as anti-American because we refuse to be scared by the scare tactics of the right and we're fed up with the politics of fear in general.

We probably deserve this. After all, we voted for President Gas Boy and his evil CEO VP the first time.

* Every thinking person on the planet with an interest in geo-politics saw the Russian thing coming except for GWB, who looked into Putin's eyes and declared him a God-fearin man. (KGB Putin couldn't believe his luck.)

Repeat after us -- We believe in The Iraq...Saving the whales in Africana...Such as...And world peace against evil-doers..and speaking English...and whatnot...Such as.

Next up: A rant on fake boobs (believe it or not, we're not big fans) and speedy guys who can't hit. Also, why we actually think Bill O'Reilly is more fair and balanced than most.

P.S. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself (and Alex Gordon or Mark Teahen coming up with runners on base and a lefty in the bullpen).

P.P.S. We drink beer and smoke cigarettes. Therefore, we are destined to fall in love with a hard-living convenience store girl who takes all of our money.

P.P.P.S. The Royals just lost 40-0. They probably won't score another run all year. It's all Bush's fault. Maybe McCain's.