Thursday, September 4, 2008

We got those steadily depressing, low down, mind messing, working at the car wash blues

We predict that the Royals are going to finish in last place.

We didn't correctly predict Obama's running mate (Biden was too easy); but guess what/who we did predict way back in May? That's right. Hurricane Sarah. See for yourself.

So who is going to be Obama's running mate? We have narrowed the field down to Bill Richardson, Ed Rendell, Kathleen Sebelius, Jim Webb and the governor of Alaska (because she's hot). Maybe, if the Royals tank tonight, we'll do a SWOT analysis of the veep field tomorrow. Because that's the kind of stuff that brings readers back again and again.

CORRECTION: The Governor of Alaska is a Republican (not that there's anything wrong with that). But she's still kind of hot.

And you didn't listen to the fact that we was genius.

Palin reminds us of a lot of red state women we know, and that's not all bad. She's more of a man than most Democrats, and she's still kind of sexy. Just once we wish the Dems would nominate somebody who knows how to bass fish or shoot a gun. Instead, we always get the guy who played in the high school band.

Americans like football players and cheerleaders, snowmobillers (sp) and hockey moms.

Now we're going to have to go through another four years of blowing shit up first and asking questions (maybe) later. This is the American way. We usually go along with it, but lately things have been getting too complex for the gang down at the bowling alley to deal with.

P.S. There's nothing on top but a bucket and a mop, and an illustrated book about birds. There's a lot up there but don't be scared.

P.P.S. Who needs action when you've got words? Or should it be...Who needs action when you've got verbs?

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